To My Goddesses

Your names are φ, Μμ, and σ. 

You belong to different landscapes of the contemporary music world. 

Although this conversation should be private, anyone can read and judge — I don’t care at all. I have bipolar disorder, alright, but does that remove me the right to believe in something higher? Would being a believer be a kind of delusion? Today, I feel like in a polytheistic church, hearing you, hearing your music from above. And we are alone, you plus me. And I run and run, and I pray. 

Running in music is the only real way — combined with (in my special case) necessary chemical treatment — I have found to balance my « disease ». I run because I love it, because every running trip is both a joy and a race against myself — and much more than that: a stairway towards faith. When I run I need feminine figures to adore (why Women? Maybe because my mother died a long time ago when I was only a teenager…); I need you peculiarly, I need to hear you, just as if you were along my road observing and cheering me on. And, when from the shuffle mode of my MP3 player emerge tracks like « Control », « I Love You But I Love Me More », or « Démodé », I may be struggling along a strong slope or sweating all my body, the world collapse and I can touch the sky. You are the ones above all — there is not any other artist providing me what you provide me. 

Miles and miles I will run thinking about you. 

See you in this world or in the afterlife. 


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